Christoph3r

On the metro home last night…

A young man sat in the seats across the aisle from me. He began muttering to himself and eventually began apologizing to the passengers on the train.

“I’m sorry. I’m a bit intoxicated right now. I’m sorry for anything that I’m doing or might do. I’m sorry. I’m sorry if I’m bothering you.”

More rambling, then he began to pray…

“Please forgive me, in the name of God and Michael Jackson. Please forgive me for my sins. I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

More rambling. I don’t recall what he was muttering about, nor could I understand much of it.

THEN…

He began to pound his fists on the seat in front of him. Boom. Boom! BOOM! BOOM!!

Passengers nervously moved away from him. My feet were dangling casually below my seat, crossed with one foot over the other. I moved them so they were firmly planted. Just in case I had to get up. To move, or defend myself.

He stomped both of his feet to the ground. Continuing to pound the seat in front of him. BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM

He began to speak in a very deep voice and rose from his seat, almost mechanically like a robot being activated:

“BY THE POWER OF SWORD!

[BOOM! BOOM!]

BY THE POWER OF THE VOICE!

[BOOM! BOOM! STOMP! STOMP!]

BY THE POWER OF THE GLOVE!!!”

He stood up next to me. His arms flexed, his fists clenched…
I looked over at him… expressionless, almost bored as if I had only just barely noticed him. (But trying to be prepared to deflect any blows if he attacked…)

He yelled: “I AM MICHAEL JACKSON REBORN!!!”

[the train was silent]

Then…

he grabbed his crotch and let out high-pitched “ooh”!
And sat down again.

Muttering to himself again, “Oh my god, I’m so embarrassed. I’m making a fool of myself. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry everyone.”